The bike I bought on ebay hasn't come yet, and I've been checking about 10 times a day online to see exactly where it is. Stupid FedEx doesn't update their shipment progress for days, so from Friday until late today, all I knew was that my bike passed through Pennsylvania. I hate waiting when I don't know how long I'm waiting for. Well, maybe I don't hate waiting so much, because I see myself as a fairly patient guy, but I want to ride it to school instead of drive, and school starts Friday. Plus, the lock I got for it is coming too, and I don't have the slightest clue where it could be now.
Something's been getting do me. I was supposed to out at Ring Road today helping to setup and promote for PUSO and Liwanag, but for some reason I couldn't get out of bed until almost noon. Then I had no clean lauundry because my the rest of my clean underwear is still sitting in my little drawer in storage at Jon's apt. from when we had to move a bunch of our stuff last Thursday night.
By the time I got showered and dressed (after my laundry was done) it was already 2:45, so I rushed over to get Scott from his school. He's actually the same kid Seachelle, Boraccho, and now Gerald have been taking care of for the past few years. It was my first day, so I was a little anxious. His friend Brett came over, so I had to keep both of them in check. Geez.
First things first, they started calling me four-eyes. Then Scott told me I have crooked teeth... and why don't I get braces... and if I've ever been to the dentist... Damn, way to make a guy feel self conscious. I hate that little tooth that make all the other ones grow in crooked. I don't even remember when it grew in, because all I remember was that I had a loose tooth, but I didn't want to lose it so I didn't chew on that side of my mouth. Now the extra one pushed the old one out so that my top teeth got pushed whichever way... so now I'm self-conscious about my teeth... when I smile, when I talk, so I find myself keeping my mouth shut. Literally. To make things worse, sometimes if I bite wrong, the tooth that sticks out cuts up my lower lip. I don't know if my parents ever had dental insurance, but they never did take any of us to the dentist. I think having four kids really makes dental insurance necessary. For all I know, I could have all my wisdom teeth in. They're probably pushing all my teeth forward, which is only screwing things up. That would explain why my teeth ache once in a while. If braces weren't so damn expensive I've get in a second. Damn. If I just close my mouth, maybe I'll forget about them. Although I still deal with my sinuses every morning, loving the rare mornings I can wake up and not feel anything clogging up my sinuses, and the breakouts that still plague me, even though I stopped growing years ago. Sometimes I feel like pulling out my own teeth, or trying every new acne medication out there, or getting surgery to fix everything... Sometimes I feel like I'm broken or something.
90 minutes of keeping the peace and making Scott and Brett do their homework, then I head off to PUSO's ice cream social. We had a good turnout, for only advertising it that day. The Liwanag mass was a little while after that, but I went home first, and just kind of melted into my chair. I couldn't explain why I was so tired, but I didn't even feel like moving or laying on something. I kept telling myself to leave so I wouldn't be late, but 7:00 turned to 7:15 to 7:30 to 7:45... I finally got there around 8, expecting that I missed only half the mass, but as it turns out, it was just about over. Man, I felt out of it, more than I have in the longest time. The weird thing was that it was so sudden.
Though I'm sure my bad eating and sleeping habits have something to do with it, along with the sinus thing (one study showed 90% of people suffering from chronic fatigue had sinus problems), I think I'm hitting E on my spiritual and emotional gas tanks. It's strange though, just coming off the LOG retreat last week and the praise and worship thing Chris and Trisha held last Friday in San Diego (which was awesome)... all this positive energy doesn't seem to be soaking in. Or maybe I'm just shutting down somehow. It's not the easiest thing to diagnose the problem because there are so many possible reasons for it.
For the first time in a long time that I can remember, I didn't go to a birthday surprise/dinner/whatever that wasn't out of the way. I figure for at least one day out of the year you should be able to go out of your way for someone, especially their birthday. Even if it's just to drop by and make a guest appearance. I got so caught up with welcome week prep for PUSO that I just wanted to finish it. By the time we finished, it was already past midnight though.
And so I'm out of it. I can't go to sleep before 2, can't wake up before 11, and don't even feel like recruiting people during welcome week. What's going on with me? It's not that I need a break... I've been on break for the past 13 weeks already. Maybe longer. God help me. I'm taking on water, and part of me doesn't want to bail it out. The other part is getting tired...
Something's been getting do me. I was supposed to out at Ring Road today helping to setup and promote for PUSO and Liwanag, but for some reason I couldn't get out of bed until almost noon. Then I had no clean lauundry because my the rest of my clean underwear is still sitting in my little drawer in storage at Jon's apt. from when we had to move a bunch of our stuff last Thursday night.
By the time I got showered and dressed (after my laundry was done) it was already 2:45, so I rushed over to get Scott from his school. He's actually the same kid Seachelle, Boraccho, and now Gerald have been taking care of for the past few years. It was my first day, so I was a little anxious. His friend Brett came over, so I had to keep both of them in check. Geez.
First things first, they started calling me four-eyes. Then Scott told me I have crooked teeth... and why don't I get braces... and if I've ever been to the dentist... Damn, way to make a guy feel self conscious. I hate that little tooth that make all the other ones grow in crooked. I don't even remember when it grew in, because all I remember was that I had a loose tooth, but I didn't want to lose it so I didn't chew on that side of my mouth. Now the extra one pushed the old one out so that my top teeth got pushed whichever way... so now I'm self-conscious about my teeth... when I smile, when I talk, so I find myself keeping my mouth shut. Literally. To make things worse, sometimes if I bite wrong, the tooth that sticks out cuts up my lower lip. I don't know if my parents ever had dental insurance, but they never did take any of us to the dentist. I think having four kids really makes dental insurance necessary. For all I know, I could have all my wisdom teeth in. They're probably pushing all my teeth forward, which is only screwing things up. That would explain why my teeth ache once in a while. If braces weren't so damn expensive I've get in a second. Damn. If I just close my mouth, maybe I'll forget about them. Although I still deal with my sinuses every morning, loving the rare mornings I can wake up and not feel anything clogging up my sinuses, and the breakouts that still plague me, even though I stopped growing years ago. Sometimes I feel like pulling out my own teeth, or trying every new acne medication out there, or getting surgery to fix everything... Sometimes I feel like I'm broken or something.
90 minutes of keeping the peace and making Scott and Brett do their homework, then I head off to PUSO's ice cream social. We had a good turnout, for only advertising it that day. The Liwanag mass was a little while after that, but I went home first, and just kind of melted into my chair. I couldn't explain why I was so tired, but I didn't even feel like moving or laying on something. I kept telling myself to leave so I wouldn't be late, but 7:00 turned to 7:15 to 7:30 to 7:45... I finally got there around 8, expecting that I missed only half the mass, but as it turns out, it was just about over. Man, I felt out of it, more than I have in the longest time. The weird thing was that it was so sudden.
Though I'm sure my bad eating and sleeping habits have something to do with it, along with the sinus thing (one study showed 90% of people suffering from chronic fatigue had sinus problems), I think I'm hitting E on my spiritual and emotional gas tanks. It's strange though, just coming off the LOG retreat last week and the praise and worship thing Chris and Trisha held last Friday in San Diego (which was awesome)... all this positive energy doesn't seem to be soaking in. Or maybe I'm just shutting down somehow. It's not the easiest thing to diagnose the problem because there are so many possible reasons for it.
For the first time in a long time that I can remember, I didn't go to a birthday surprise/dinner/whatever that wasn't out of the way. I figure for at least one day out of the year you should be able to go out of your way for someone, especially their birthday. Even if it's just to drop by and make a guest appearance. I got so caught up with welcome week prep for PUSO that I just wanted to finish it. By the time we finished, it was already past midnight though.
And so I'm out of it. I can't go to sleep before 2, can't wake up before 11, and don't even feel like recruiting people during welcome week. What's going on with me? It's not that I need a break... I've been on break for the past 13 weeks already. Maybe longer. God help me. I'm taking on water, and part of me doesn't want to bail it out. The other part is getting tired...
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home