I'm not sure
or am I denying
my hands
my words
my thoughts
all my weapons
my tools
don't seem to be working
as well as they used to
things are changing
things are different
this isn't my way
this wasn't my choice
but this is my life
defying conventionality
shunning normality
avoiding the "everyday"
never quite finding a place
to rest
a direction I don't control
as much as I would like
my feet
they've taken me places
some where I could not stand
others where I could not see
now where I cannot breathe
it's choking me
but I don't protest
because it's the truth
and the only thing I can accept
it's the definition
of my experience
what drives my mind
my soul
left to decide
to struggle with it
or run away
here I am
Lord give me strength
I can't do this alone