Tuesday, January 04, 2011

open invitation

They say dreams are a window into your subconscious, maybe even into your soul. I had two this morning that have me wondering.

Dream sequence #1:

[I don't remember this one that clearly... skipping to the first clear thing] I was sitting behind the large desk downstairs in the den, but I was at the house I used to live in back before 9th grade. I was having an argument with my mom [I guess everything was shifted back in time except it didn't seem like I was a different age... funny] about a fight I got into. Actually, I basically got jumped by four or five guys. And I was pistol whipped. My mom was upset that I got into a fight in the first place, and I was upset that she wasn't having any sympathy on me, not to mention the fact that I didn't do anything to provoke the fight in the first place.

Then as I was trying to explain what happened to my mom, I went into a dream flashback and saw myself get surrounded my the four or five guys who jumped me, in what seemed to be my kitchen [probably as a loose reconstruction of "past events" in the "present" tense and setting of the dream]. Right at the start, I got pistol whipped [butt of the gun] and then take a beating. I don't think I was even halfway conscious at that point. [I don't remember much after that]

End dream sequence #1

Dream sequence #2:

First thing I remember is asking my friend "L" to stay over for a little while. He stayed somewhere that looked like on of the three story apartment complexes in Irvine. Then for some reason I remembered that one of my one homegirls also lived there, and apparently didn't mind if I stayed over, so I went into her apartment and found that nobody was home. I wanted to take a shower, and then suddenly I'm walking around in my boxers [only because nobody was home] and then lost track of the time wandering around the apartment.

[Then there's a shift in the setting] I found myself in the apartment of "Y" [who I haven't seen in a while], and remembered him talking about how nice his room was. So I kept walking around [these apartments seemed more like large five bedroom houses in my dream] and found a large bedroom, very nicely furnished, with a walk in closet opposite the bed. I looked in and it was like a cave, but I thought the clothes in there didn't look like things "Y" would normally wear. Then I walked around and found a connected room that was a little smaller and looked in the closet and figured it must be "Y's" room. I sat down for a minute by the bed in the second room and "G" walks in, not too surprised to see me. Then friend "K" comes in and things come together in my head.

I didn't know "K" had lived with "Y", or even anywhere close, and it was obvious from the look on "K's" face that he was caught in a lie. Then he half apologizes [without bothering to look me in the eye] and tries to talk about something to avoid the awkwardness. All I could think about was what a damn fool I've been for not thinking something was up. That, plus the fact it seemed there were more than a few people helping keep the secret [though I couldn't think of any reason why "K" would lie about that, other than to passive-aggressively avoid me.

End dream sequence #2

Sometimes dreams seem closer to reality than reality itself.

persona non grata

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