I'm awake. Out of bed. Walking around. The funny thing is... I didn't hear any of my alarms. Who would have thought?

Lazy days

I wish I knew why I was so tired. I thinks it's a combination of my lingering sickness/allergies, post-workout soreness, midterm recovery (from Thursday), and sleeping habits that are completely out of whack. I think I'll get some early rest in tonight and hopefully I'll be out of bed before 8:30. The sad part is I don't even know if I can pull that off. Sad.

After getting through physics lab on the last of my trail mix, I grabbed some Subway and headed off to the Interfaith open mic night. I forgot there was food being served, so I waited before I ate again. And ate again I did. Too much in fact. But it was a good night, and it looks like everyone enjoyed themselves. The food coma set in quick though, so I peaced out. And that brings me here. Bored out my mind. I'm going to sleep it off...

I don't how to score it, but...

- free pasta at Scott's house
- I kicked post-child-care laziness in the ass and worked out. So wuzz up now?
- missed a free movie
- spent $7.50 on a movie. Unheard of!
- fringe food benefits
- "I thought you were a freshman." Damn, twice in one day? WTH? (-2)
- friendly "collections"

Let's say it's 8-3. I'm on the board.

This is the story of life
confusion
thoughts
feelings
instincts
doubts
regret
fights
wounds
triumphs
revelations
decisions
actions
words
love

the pen runs on the paper without lifting off...
lines spelling words
words spelling ideas
ideas filling space
space creating opportunity
opportunity displaced by experience
experience lived.

I almost forgot I was writing.

Score: LIFE 3, JASON 0

Oh man... what's going on?

Here we go again

I have the feeling I'm about to go on a crazy ride... I don't know what's going on exactly. Right now I'm either:
- too tired to prevent it from happening
- too out of it to know what to think
- thinking too much
- waiting too long
- dreaming
- set on autopilot
- losing it

Things are spiraling to a close, and strangely, out of control. Seven weeks or so left to make something out of this mess. And what a mess it is.

Do I really have time for all this?

And the song plays on...

The day went from not so great to pretty nasty to just sad, but closed on a good note. I'm getting frustrated lately. But even though we lost our volleyball game (damn, we were so close!) it was a lot of fun. Krusty and I dropped by the Bren Events Center to see how PCN practice was going, and somehow we ended up picking up Gerald and Francia and rolling out to surprise April for her birthday. We met up at the Albertson's parking lot across the street and chilled out. It's times like those that make me forget why I have bad days... or weeks... or worse. Then we had to figure out how to light the candles without a lighter. (Good thing t.p.+car cigarette lighter=flames) Little did I know I'd be wiping cake off myself before driving home. It was fun. Good greasy fun. I'm still a little greasy. Damn neighbor that complains about the water noises.

And that's how life is sometimes... whatever dreams may come...

For once I feel like I'm not missing out on everything, despite not doing PCN or basketball for IMs and having to spread my time around.

Maybe we could sit on a step somewhere and talk. That would make my day.

OutKast - Aquemini track 15 ("'Liberation' might be one of the best songs I have ever heard in my 27 years of living.")

Liberation

Who's dream is this? Oh dreams. Could I be the only one sleeping? That's two dreams now. Dreams fight reality and reality doesn't break a sweat. Things didn't fall into place time time. Or last time. What else can I do? My head is aching. This is sad. Time is running out... the door.

Going in a new direction...

It's funny how things happen sometimes. My mind is still unsettled, but notto the point that it bothers me anymore. I'm just choosing to fight these losing battles. Maybe someday I'll break through. The wheels are turning though. Quite literally, as well as figuartively. I'll see if I can ride this for a while. Whatever this is...

I can't keep doing this.
Why can't I sleep?